Me & Crazy People, Part II

by pjmcbride

English: Several Bag-in-Box containers (here, ...

English: Several Bag-in-Box containers (here, containing soft drink syrup), connected to a fountain drink system. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yeah, Part I was oh-so-many posts ago, and no, I don’t know how to link to it. But isn’t this the level of service you’ve come to expect? But first…(Ever notice how it’s feast or famine around here? Or, to employ a different cliche, it never rains but it pours? A cliche that used to confuse me–how can it pour if it never rains?)

Mildly (very mildly) Amusing Adventures:

–The medical building at Franklin & St Joe has laid down new carpet in the hall, with a pattern that looks like a generous quantity of turds have been scattered on a gray background. One hopes a stray dog never gets in there and does what stray dogs do, because they’d be a long time finding it. What the dog did, I mean, not the dog itself. Well, maybe if the dog itself were brown and gray they’d have trouble finding the dog. OK, somebody shut me up.

And World Leader Pretend:

When I rule the world, you will not be allowed, when filling yourself a fountain drink, to fill up your cup, then gulp down a third of it, then fill it again before putting the lid on and paying for it. Repeating that process twice, as I witnessed today, will be a felony. Police officers lounging around in there between runs, I mean, giving the business extra patrol (Nice save, huh, Nick? You’re not keeping a list of my offenses in the event of a ride-along, are you?), are exempt from this law, but should be ashamed of themselves for not setting a good example.

I anxiously checked the October schedule–what position will I be on Halloween, since I have to work? Let me be city, let me be city, let me be city–I’m phones! Crap, crap, crap. (“Crap, crap, crap” really was my first thought.) OK, then, please let me have to monitor a tac channel instead ALL NIGHT LONG. Yes, I’m hoping a series of felonies occur in the city on Halloween night for my personal convenience. I. Am. Not. Insane.

OK, now I don’t feel like writing about Me and Crazy People. (You may recall {Yes, we recall every one of your previous words!} that this happened before, which is why this is Part II. Perhaps it will never get written.) I’ll save it for some day when I have nothing else to say. Over and out.