Your Tax Dollars At Play

by pjmcbride

English: United States Internal Revenue Servic...

English: United States Internal Revenue Service Criminal Investigation Division Badge (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

No, this is not about dancing IRS employees.

What it is about (if I may publicize somebody else’s Good Idea) is my esteemed colleague T.R.O.’s adaptation of an old 3rd shift game, Word of the Night. As you may recall if you remember my old posts with any accuracy, 3rd shift dispatchers would sometimes select an unusual word or phrase, and then try to work it into a phone or on-air conversation. For Word of the Afternoon (Word of the Evening? what the hell is 2nd shift anyway, besides where I’ve spent most of my life?), T.R.O., knowing that officers will work for food (I believe they train them with treats), assigned the Magic Word to the officers instead, and promised a stromboli to the winner. The Magic Word was “gravitationally-challenged.” (Also, KatClaire came up with the Magic Phrase to use next time, “pharmaceutically-gifted.)

What I found fascinating (I wasn’t actually there, being on vacation, but monitored it via Facebook) is the apparently-universal tendency to weasel one’s way around the rules, and then argue about whether this constitutes cheating. What about a rookie officer, who has to say whatever his training officer tells him to? What if I were to lie down on the sidewalk and pretend to be gravitationally-challenged, to give a certain officer the opportunity? And so on. By the time we went to press, a winner had not yet been declared, although I have trouble believing there was a shortage of drunks on a Friday night, I mean evening. Not that I personally require alcohol to fall down and injure myself, but most people seem to.

The other night, Nick said, “Perhaps you need a ride-along to correct your misconceptions about police work.” I don’t know, Nick–that sounds like an unpleasant process, so I think I’ll pass, if it’s all the same to you. After all, you did say “perhaps.” (…backing away as he flexes his claws…)