Pacifying the FanBase

by pjmcbride

Reckless Driving

Reckless Driving (Photo credit: MyNeChimKi)

Because I am nothing if not considerate (shut up, Nick), here is a brief post before I go to bed. This will keep you all occupied until I write at greater length tomorrow, since a topic occurred to me on my walk home.

–Best Caller of 4/7/13 Award goes to the mother who explained to her 9-year-old daughter that a guinea pig refusing to come out from under something did not, in fact, constitute a 911 emergency.

–Worst Caller of 4/7/13 Award goes to the man who said grimly, “I want to report attempted murder.” Upon questioning, he stated that a guy had run him and another vehicle off the road. No, what you want to report is reckless driving. I would say to save the drama for yo’ mama, but my mother hated drama.

Somebody told me today (well, yesterday–you know, that 4/7/13 thing) that she was glad I have this outlet. I like calling it an outlet, as if, if I couldn’t write, I’d go on a rampage and lay waste to entire cities. Which I wouldn’t, because that would involve travel, and travel is inconvenient. Like cats, I believe inconvenience is a sin.

Rumor Central sez Lisa is applying for the supervisor position. Pass it on! I care not for her reprisal.